All posts with the ‘ Emotional Intelligence ’ Tag

The Stories We Tell Ourselves

Last week at HOW Design Live I was lucky enough to see Dr.Brené Brown speak.

This was A Big Deal for me.

I’ve been fangirling over Dr. Brown’s work since I discovered it about a year and a half ago. I was so excited to see her speak I forgot to tell friends I was going to the conference because I was speaking.

I … Read More

Less Stressful Negotiations

If just hearing the word “negotiation” makes your stomach hurt, if the idea of conflict makes you tense, if your first reaction to the idea of negotiating anything is to break out in a cold sweat of anxiety, friend, modern science has the cure for you!

This curative has been proven to boost your confidence and dissolve your fears. Tasks that seemed impossible prior to … Read More

Power Play

People waste a ridiculous amount of time worrying about power in negotiations.

They worry about having it, or getting it or stopping others from taking it. They invest precious time trying to figure out how best to prove their power, like where to sit in the room or who gets to talk first.

The problem with wasting your time like this is that you put … Read More

The Positive Power of Negativity

Your goal for this week: complain.

You must bitch and moan and highlight the injustice of your plight.

You must be sincere. You must be honest. You must provide details, including dates and names.

You must release this negativity into the world intentionally, preparing yourself for positive returns.

There’s just one catch.

You can’t complain about anyone else. You have to complain about yourself, and … Read More

How to Earn a Free Negotiation Consultation

I’ve probably taken the Myers-Briggs personality test, or some variation on it, at least a dozen times over the course of my life so far.

Every time I’ve taken it in the last twenty years, the proctor has given me the results with a raised eyebrow.

Why?… Read More

Fair Isn’t Always Fair

I’ve found that when people first start negotiating, they tend to put a high priority on being fair.

Being fair is generally a very honorable pursuit. But in negotiations fairness does not always mean what you think it means. At least, not to the other side.… Read More

The Selfish Importance of Gratitude

Last week was the United States’ annual celebration of gratitude, Thanksgiving. If you’re a regular reader of my blog, it should come as no surprise that Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays: a time to reflect on what is good and appreciate what we have.

I’m always sad that it passes so quickly.

So here is my plug for prolonging the holiday spirit and … Read More

Horrible Disease Affecting Negotiators. Are You at Risk?

Have you ever described a difficult negotiation by saying:

“They’re being unreasonable.” or “I don’t know why they don’t care about fixing this.” or “They’re just jerks; that’s the problem.”

If you answered “yes” you may be suffering from a serious, but curable, condition known as conflictus conflatiitis.  … Read More

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5 Things to Know Before You Sign Your Publishing Contract

The following is the first of five emails from a free e-course about understanding publishing contracts. You can sign up for the rest of the course here. In any publishing deal, you're in charge. That's because a publishing contract is you giving the publisher permission to use your work. They need permission and


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